Meet Andria! A thoughtful mama raising five (5!!) children – from toddler to teen – in Atlanta, Georgia. Authentic…confident…she inspires us to cherish the messy, imperfect world of parenting. Her (tried and tested) gems of inspiration are brilliant.
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What’s something you try to teach your children?
- Gratitude. We have a secret code that I say out loud when things go off the rails: ‘G to G’ (grumbling to gratitude). When their hearts start to grumble, we talk about how to turn that grumbling to gratitude. As the kids get older, we’re really seeing the fruits of this teaching. It’s a beautiful thing.
Biggest parenting challenge right now:
- Meeting the very different needs of children ages 3-13. For example, my 13-year old can be sharing the joys of his day when my 3-year old starts crying that she peed on the floor, while the 9-year old pines for homework help, and the 5-year old rams her scooter into the ankle of the 11-year old.
- Dinner table and car conversations are also chaotic; it’s not as simple as asking a child about their day. I want to enjoy what my 11-year old is sharing with me, but it’s hard to connect when the 3-year old is crying because her book fell, the 5-year old is irritating the 9-year old, and the 13-year old wants to play a new song for me.
- I’m constantly pulled in five different directions and through those different pulls, I often let someone down because keeping up with their individual needs (in the way they’d like) is hard. BUT I rejoice in the beauty and joy that truly happens in the midst of the chaos. The messy life we live is an amazing gift.
Rainy days – What do you do?!
- We love to play hide and seek, light candles, sit on the front porch and enjoy the rain. My boys love to jump on the trampoline in the rain. Rainy days call out the homebody in all of us – we just get more pleasant and look for cozy ‘together’ activities.
What’s something you say to your children each night at bedtime?
- I pray over my children every night, out loud. Every night they hear me speak out loud, “I am grateful I am your mama and I am grateful that you are my children.” It is important to me that they hear me delight in their lives and give thanks for them.
What do you wish you would do more of as a parent?
- I wish I would read out loud more with all of my children. I used to read book after book with all of them; now I find myself reading with only the two youngest kids. I would love to spend more time reading as a family, but the reality of that with children ages 3-13 is just difficult.
“I too often think my children’s behavior reflects the parent that I am, and I let that get in the way of just letting them be. I wish I would focus less on their behavior and more on their hearts.”
What’s your favorite thing to do as a family?
- We love going for walks, grilling hot dogs, playing board games, riding bikes, going out to eat, but some of our best memories have been created through travel. Our youngest is 3 and she has been on 5 international trips and our oldest (13) has been on 17 international trips. As a large family, we talk a lot about being a team, and that teamwork shines brightest when we’re traveling.
- Traveling with lots of kids is never easy and there are plenty of sibling fights, but it’s worth the work. I think people romanticize vacation as a time to be ‘off duty’ – peaceful, easy and little effort. On the contrary! Traveling with 5 kids is hard, busy, loud, chaotic, but so special. The memories and life lessons that remain in our hearts and minds are priceless.
- We want our children to know and appreciate the world around us – to connect with people from different countries, cultures, languages, etc. My husband and I have the mindset that while we have the health and provision to travel, we will do it. We didn’t wait for the baby to be potty trained or to drop naps; we won’t wait for the youngest two kids to be able to keep up with our 6-mile walks…we grab their strollers and go! We explore the world around us and we never regret it. But yes, it takes a lot of work and patience.
What’s a recent event that you wish you could do-over with your child?
- I can definitely think of times when I’ve messed up – things I’d say or do differently, but honestly, I don’t think about wishing for do-overs. We talk a lot about reconciliation in our family. We tell our kids that we will most definitely make mistakes, but it’s because we’re always learning and growing.
- In our family, when someone has said something they regret, they apologize, the other party forgives, the air is cleared, and we move on together. We believe it’s good for our kids’ hearts to know there are no grudges, and there’s no need to perform to gain our love.
Words of wisdom you’d share with a new parent:
- Revel in the stage your child is in. Don’t look to the left or to the right, just look to the child in front of you. Comparing can be the thief of joy. Do whatever you need to do (even if it means putting your phone away) to relish in the moments – your moments. This season will not last forever.
- Every parent is seriously stretched in whatever stage they’re in. You can and will journey forward.
*Plinkit is proud to share these parent profiles as they authentically represent the diverse voices of our Plinkit readership. The views and opinions expressed in these parent profiles are those of the authors and may not necessarily reflect those of Plinkit Pte. Ltd.
