Spread the Love!
Power struggles and harried mornings for both parent and child are normal, and yet not a fun way to start anyone’s day. A simple tool, like a visual routine chart, can help mornings go more smoothly.
Learn
Basic Concepts
- Though it may pain us to admit, children spend a significant portion of their days being told what to do. Many of these tasks are necessary, but not necessarily pleasant for children to do.
- The heart of the issue (and key to successful routines) is timing. The concept of time to an adult is different from that of a child, which is why transitions are so difficult for children.
- As adults, we may need to organize our timing to work for our children; we also need to find a reasonable timing that works and respects all the learning that is taking place on ‘kid time’. A visual chart can help your child to organize and stay on task, while promoting all that great learning.
- Individualizing is the most effective way to set children up for success.
- Some children are going to be very motivated by a chart alone, others are going to need more time to complete the steps.
- Mornings require frequent transitions within a short period of time, and for some children, transitions are especially challenging.
- Some children find comfort and calm in knowing a plan and what’s coming next.
- Involving children in their to-dos and encouraging them to take ownership of these tasks, builds their independence and can reduce conflict and create a positive and peaceful start to the day.
- Concepts from empowering children with a morning routine chart can be extended to other parts of the day that require quick or many transitions (e.g., bedtime routine, routine for the day, evening or weekend chores, etc.).
Just Remember
- The key to successful routines is timing. Time for an adult is different from that of a child. Find a timing that works and respects your timing and the learning that is taking place on kid time.
- One size does not fit all. Consider your child’s age and developmental level before determining:
- The timing to complete all tasks; and
- Which tasks you want your child to assume responsibility for.
- Unlike other charts, there is no built-in reward – A routine chart is a tool to help identify which tasks must be done before leaving the house.
- However, if mornings are consistently difficult with frequent meltdowns, the morning routine chart could be coupled with a reward system. Marbles? Stickers? For example, children could earn a marble or sticker for each day they complete their tasks. After a predetermined number of marbles or stickers, a reward could be earned.
Do
Core Marbles
- Put up a chart. (Print our Make-It-Your-Own template.)
- Individualize it for your child; set them up for success.
- Identify the tasks.
- Act out the routine. Reinforce your expectations.
- Praise your child for completing their charts. Point out the impact.
How to Make a Morning Routine Chart Happen
- Put up a chart – Make one or buy one; doesn’t have to be fancy or complicated – just get something up. Lots of examples out there; just choose one that works for your family. We’ve searched high and low – these are our favorite freebies:
- Printable #1 (print “Scale to Fit” entire image)
- Printable #2
- Printable #3
- Individualize it to set your child up for success.
- For some children, posting the chart may be sufficient. For others, laminating a chart and using a dry erase marker to indicate a completed task works better. And for others, a commercial routine chart involving moving magnets when a task is completed is more motivating.
- Identify which tasks will be part of your child’s routine.
- Children as young as two can be in charge of washing their faces and finding their shoes if these are represented with pictures. Older children can make their beds, pack their backpacks, brush teeth, and get dressed with a fair amount of independence.
- Act out the routine in your preferred order, though recognize your children may put their own unique spin on it. The real victory is in completing the charts and experiencing a peaceful morning, so don’t fret too much about the order. Acting out the tasks is a fun way can to teach and reinforce your expectations.
- Provide extra help when first implementing the chart; ensuring successful early experiences will keep the momentum going. But you’ll ultimately want your child to independently own the tasks.
- Praise your child for completing their charts, and point out the impact on the morning.
- “Wow, you are working so hard at doing everything on your chart and I really appreciate how helpful it is in getting ready. I didn’t even ask you to brush your teeth; you did it all by yourself!”
On Making Your Own Chart
- Making a routine chart with your child may seem onerous but the payoff is worth it. You get their buy-in (they’ll actually want to do the activities), and they’ll feel empowered.
- Start with this easy blank template. Simply sit down with your child for five minutes (during breakfast or dinner works well), and with just a pen and paper, decide on the key activities they need to accomplish each morning. Write the activities in list form, draw a picture next to each one, and voila, there’s your chart! The visual impact is key. Ask your child to write their name on it, display the chart somewhere visible, and watch the magic unfold.
- Customize it – Make it fancier with completion check boxes, more sophisticated with nuanced activities for older kids, etc. Different kids in the same family could have different charts tailored to their personality and development.
Paige Abramson Hirsch, Teacher + Education Consultant + Parent
Paige Abramson Hirsch is an elementary school teacher turned lawyer turned educational administrator and educational consultant supporting school districts and charter schools. Paige studied psychology with a focus in child development at Tufts University and holds a JD/M.Ed from the University of Minnesota. Paige previously served on the Board of HAND, a non-profit for bereaved parents. She lives in San Carlos, California with her husband and two young children, whom she thanks for providing her with endless opportunities to analyze child development and behavior!
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