Get flustered in the heat of the moment when your children fight? Use these three key phrases to stop sibling fighting.
Learn
Almost all siblings fight – it’s normal and we should expect it (research shows young siblings fight about once every ten minutes!). But, children are often not in a problem-solving mood when fighting (who wants to learn to share a toy in the heat of the moment?!), or ‘Le Pause’ (letting children figure out how to get out of the situation on their own) may not always work when things are becoming unsafe, or grown-ups may not have the immediate capacity or patience to work through a fight (i.e., in the car, rushing out the door) – that’s just reality.
Focus on learning three key phrases to get your children grounded immediately.
Do
3 Things to Say to Immediately Stop a Fight
- “Everybody freeze!”
- “Time out. Stop!”
- “Everybody take five deep breaths.”
- When kids are in ‘fight’ mode, they’re not receptive to incoming speech. You’ll need to say something that will immediately break your children out of ‘fight’ mode.
- The first thing to do is to get everyone grounded – recalibrated. This could be spinning around one child, or giving another child a sensory input. Without the grounding, or recalibration, the core behavior can’t be addressed.
- Get up to speed on 5 steps to handle sibling fights.
