Meet Regan! Pragmatic, thoughtful and deeply focused on creating small moments of joy. She is always investing in presence and purpose, and her gratitude for being a mother shines bright and true: “I’m so lucky to have the gift of showing them the world.” Connecting with her boys, while providing them with opportunities to explore and develop confidence and autonomy, are the foundation of her parenting playbook.
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On Parenting
What’s something that worries you about raising children these days?
- There’s so much to worry over, especially right now. Over the past few weeks, our lives have taken a sudden shift with the Shelter in Place directive. Although there are several challenges, this time together is also a gift. We’ve been able to slow things down and just ‘be’ – there’s no rushing from one place to the other.
- We are enjoying all of our meals together, not just a few throughout the week. This period has also been an opportunity to figure out ways we can give back as a family to those in need – for the kids to understand how our family can support the greater community. This week at dinner, Theo said, “Mom, I want to be the one who is giving, not receiving meals.” It brought tears to my eyes.
- As a family, we are working hard to take everything day by day and to focus on the positive.
A parenting challenge right now:
- I work full-time, so juggling everything is a challenge. I do a lot of meal prep in advance; that definitely helps. The most important thing to me is being present for my kids. I think about this constantly. It’s easier said than done, but I really focus and work hard on being present as much as possible. Although, with everything else that is going on around me and the never-ending mental list of tasks, it’s hard. But I really work at being mindful about it. It also sets a good example for the kids on how to control our thoughts.
How do you get your children to do something they don’t know how to do?
- I try to turn it into a game or find a way to motivate them. (They also respond quite well to chocolate!)
- I also use Plinkit’s Marble Jar and they love that – at one point we had three of them going, all targeting different behaviors!
What do you wish you would do more / less of as a parent?
- More: Bike. There’s a lot of traffic where we live and I think it would be great to have more opportunities to bike rather than drive. The kids love getting on their bikes; it gives them a sense of independence, not to mention exercise.
- Less: Stress. There’s a lot of anxiety/stress/self-doubt that comes with raising kids. At the end of the day though, my husband and I are just trying to make the best decisions possible with the information we have at any given moment. Thank goodness for my friends who help out so much too. I have such great friends and I really value their feedback and support.
5 surprising things about parenting:
- On your children’s learning: The boys both surprise me daily. One is a history buff, the other is a budding tailor. (Go figure!) They are both so creative, but in different ways. I love watching their imaginations run wild after they learn a new concept or get excited about something they see. I remember being ‘in it’ as a child – so caught up in my own imagination – and it’s really awe-inspiring to see your children lost in that same wonderland, especially as they build that sibling bond.
- On school: There is more to school than academics. Get to know your teachers well and volunteer in the classroom if available. It’s an opportunity to take it all in and get to know the other kids as well. I love getting to know my boys’ friends and watching their personalities blossom.
- On toys: My kids are most creative with basic toys like LEGOs, blocks and KAPLAs. Theo just built an epic series of mountains out of paper grocery bags.
- On food: We try to keep it as healthy as possible and educate the kids on making good choices for themselves.
- On childcare: It’s especially hard when you don’t live close to family; when you don’t have a built-in village for life’s ad hoc needs. I’ve found great caregiver recommendations from friends and networks online. If you are hiring a nanny, keep the conversation open with your children so they know that you value their feedback and input. You want to make sure everyone is happy.
On Your Family
Describe a favorite family tradition.
- We make it a point to have a big meal on Sundays and those are always fun. We are all able to press pause from our busy lives and enjoy dinner together. And the meal itself is usually pretty involved – the kids help cook and set the table. They really enjoy contributing to the meal. As the kids have gotten older, the conversations have evolved to become more complex. Answers to questions about their day are now nuanced and layered. It’s beautiful watching their sophisticated minds grow. It’s a really special and treasured time for us all.
What are your children’s 3 favorite books?
- 6-year old: LEGO Character Encyclopedia (Over and over and over again!)
- 8-year old: National Geographic’s Big Book of Why, The Hobbit.
On Your Wisdom
What’s something from your childhood that is true for your children? What’s different?
- True: I love the contagious laughter that seems never-ending with kids.
- Different: I grew up in a small town in Ohio, and my kids are growing up in a major metropolitan area, so it’s a completely different experience for them. I spent a lot of time exploring when I was little; being a child was different then. I wish my kids had more opportunities to explore on their own. My kids have access to things like the ocean and amazing museums, but I think you can have a wonderful childhood anywhere. No matter where you are, childhood can be amazing. It really boils down to the people you are surrounded by, not necessarily the landscape.
Words you’d like to share with your children’s teacher:
- I would like to thank them for guiding my children each day, and for being patient and kind. Along the way, we have been so lucky in having really wonderful teachers.
Words of wisdom you’d share with a new parent:
- Know that if you are going through a difficult stage, it will pass.
- Just like I tell my kids, when you are frustrated, take a deep breath in. I do the same thing and it really grounds me.
- Find the joy in each moment.
- Always be there for your child and let them know how much you love them. You can never say “I love you” too much.
*Plinkit is proud to share these parent profiles as they authentically represent the diverse voices of our Plinkit readership. The views and opinions expressed in these parent profiles are those of the authors and may not necessarily reflect those of Plinkit Pte. Ltd.