*Yet* – Three letters that may change your child’s outlook on life, even among the youngest learners. Learn how the word *yet* develops grit and growth mindset, and the useful phrases you can say to reframe defeatist statements.
Learn
Basic Concepts
- Mindset – The power of believing you can improve has been a child development tenet for years now, and we do our children a world of good when we encourage a growth mindset through our words and actions. But for children who naturally have a fixed mindset, teaching the power of *yet* is a strategic way of reframing their thoughts and increasing motivation and persistence.
- Grit – Research tells us that, along with several other important qualities, grit is a key indicator of future success. Grit, in kid-friendly language, is the ability to continue working towards a goal, even when failure, challenges and setbacks arise. Think persistence and perseverance, “stick-to-it-ness”, according to Mindset pioneer, Carol Dweck, a psychology professor at Stanford University.
- If praising kids wisely is one step to reinforcing growth mindset, then embracing the word *yet* is a helpful way to develop grit.
Do
Reframe Defeatist Statements
- *Yet* implies it will happen; it’s just a matter of time. Take something tangible, like writing the alphabet or learning to read, for example. A child may find it difficult to write the letter G – now, but in time, they will get there. *Yet* tells your child that they’re on a learning curve.
- *Yet* empowers your child to feel in control over doing something difficult or mastering a new skill. It signals to your child that their capability is not fixed.
- It builds confidence in your child that even if something is hard now, your child has what it takes to figure it out.
- A growth mindset tells us we can grow our brain by practicing.
Helpful Tips
- Model using *yet* in your own life – Children learn how to work through difficulties by observing their grown-ups. You could be the most powerful tool in teaching your child the power of *yet*. For example:
- The next time your child asks you a question to which you don’t know the answer, reframe your response to, “I don’t know that – yet. But I can find out.”
- After a run, share with your child that you can’t run long distances – yet, but by training, you will eventually be able to.
- Maybe you want to learn a new language? It’s easy to show that while you can’t speak French – yet, practicing every day will help you reach that goal.
- Normalize mistakes – Mistakes are good. Mistakes are helpful. They’re necessary and they teach. Let your child know that mistakes are steps along the way to success. And there are many different paths to success. And success has many different outcomes. Mistakes build the resilience, tenacity and confidence to get through challenges. A strong mindset – not just a growth mindset – suggests you can learn anything. Phrases you can say to your child:
- “Mistakes mean you’re trying.”
- “Mistakes mean we have to keep testing new ideas.”
- “Mistakes are exercises for your brain. It’s brain-ercise!”
Useful Phrases
| Instead of… | Try *Saying* This | And *Doing* This |
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More useful phrases: build a growth mindset and 5 things you can say if your child fails.
Bonus Fun
- Practice growth mindset with this activity kit.
- Share this Janelle Monae and Sesame Street video with your child to make the concept playful.